Thursday, June 25, 2015

Bridal Brain



Bridal Brain is REAL

I recently met with a flustered, emotional, forgetful, new bride who broke down crying in my office because she had misplaced the contact number for the person of her venue.  It was really not a big deal at all and she could have very easily sent it to me later.  To her however, it was just one more thing that she had needed to do in her never ending list to plan her perfect wedding.


I told her she was suffering from what I call Bridal Brain.




Bridal Brain: (noun) A state of mind where common sense is suspended, absentmindedness is very common, small tasks become insurmountable and crying is generally the reaction to anything . . . good or bad. 




Bizarre dreams, lack of focus, forgetfulness, irritability, emotional highs and lows are no laughing matter.  Especially when you are planning the biggest day of your life!  So what's a bride to do when she is suffering from Bridal Brain? 




Be Organized:

Keep a file to organize your contracts for the different vendors you have hired.  Make a To Do List once a week with things that are important to get done.  Don't overwhelm yourself by putting too many items on that list.  Prioritize the list with the most important items at the top so that if you don't get to them all, at least you got the most important things done.  Keep a note pad with you at all times to jot done important details and review these notes often so you don't overlook something.  Use a planner tool (there are many soft copy and online guides).  Not everything in them will apply to you but it is helpful to have some sort of guide to compare your planning with.  Perhaps look into a separate checking account for your wedding expenses.  This will help you keep track of what you are spending and where.  A separate email account for all of your wedding information to be sent to helps keep work and wedding related emails separate.


 

Be Good to Yourself:

Don't forget to have your regular routine and do the things that make you happy.  Go to the movies, attend the yoga classes that calm you, spend time with friends doing non wedding things.  Your wedding is very important but so is your mental health.  Take time each day to do something you enjoy.  If you are finding a wedding task to be particularly overwhelming hand it to someone else.  Let your partner, your MOH or even your mom help you out.  You can delegate tasks and still have an amazing wedding you don't have to do it all yourself.


Remember the "Bigger Picture"


The saying "Don't Sweat the Small Stuff" couldn't be more relevant during this busy time in your life.  I know weddings are full of details but honestly on your 25th Anniversary are you going to look back and think about the charger plate color?  Probably not.  Make a commitment to not sweat the small stuff!  Marrying your chosen partner is the true reason for the season.  While it can be difficult to truly "let go" when the time comes, you will end up missing your day if you come from a place of fault finding and controlling every detail.  Your wedding only happens once!  You only get one shot to take it all in and enjoy the love that will be surrounding you that day.  The rarity is what makes a wedding day so special, so be sure to think long term before you start seeing red over trivial things. 


What is important is that you are marrying your best friend.  The one person who you want to spend the rest of your life with.